David Harbour’s famous ex, Alison Sudol, admits she was scared after calling him a ‘bully’

David Harbour’s ex Alison Sudol has been pouring her heart out on social media since Lily Allen’s West End Girl album was released two weeks ago.

As Harbour, 50, was getting ready for his big red carpet moment for the series premiere of Stranger Things finale, in which he plays big softie hero Jim Hopper, his ex-wife blew the lid off their messy marriage and stole all the thunder.

In her stunning and critically acclaimed comeback album, Lily, 40, who says the lyrics are ‘auto-fiction’, accuses Harbor of cheating, lying and gaslighting in their marriage, which she opened up so she could sleep with strangers for pay.

However, their ‘arrangement’ falls through when Lily sings about finding a text with Madeline – who is actually costume designer Natalie Tippet – a woman Harbor knows.

In Pussy Palace Lily sings that she ‘found a shoebox full of handwritten letters / From heartbroken women wishing you could be better’.

Lily also sings about finding a bag full of ‘sex toys, butt plugs and lube in it’ and wonders if Harbor is a ‘sex addict’.

Alongside the scandal are honest lyrics of heartbreak, including Lily considering returning to alcohol after being pushed back by her relationship.

While Harbour’s former co-stars including Florence Pugh, Milla Jovovich and Lily Rabe, and her ex Julia Stiles, have quietly supported Lily’s album by liking a number of social media posts promoting West End Girl, Alison has opened up on social media about her experience with an ex, by which she very much means Harbour.

Posting on social media last week, Alison shared a close-up photo of herself lying in bed with bags under her eyes looking defeated, and explained to her followers that the photo was taken in June 2019, when she was living in a luxury New York apartment and her relationship was breaking down.

According to US Weekly, Harbor and Alison split in July 2019 after first being linked in January 2018. Harbor was then seen hanging out with Lily in August 2019.

‘I feel sad because I don’t focus. I drifted in and out of focus. It was the end of a relationship but I didn’t know it yet,’ Alison wrote in the post, recalling the moment.

‘I thought I knew something was wrong, I suspected I wasn’t okay, but I was so confused, caught up in a narrative that wasn’t mine but was so loud I couldn’t hear any further.

‘I can’t get my thoughts straight. It was clear that I couldn’t change things, so I kept trying to change myself.’

The Dig actress later said ‘the thing about bullies’ is that they ‘know how to win’.

‘They tie your hands and convince you that you have done it yourself. “It happens at the micro level, it happens at the macro level,” he explained.

The Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them actress says her strategy is to ‘lie down’ and nurse her wounds quietly when alone.

“Still, I managed to put an ocean between me and that guy,” he continued.

‘I have spent the last 6 years being very careful about who I surround myself with. I have rebuilt my sense of self, learned how to love + be loved in healthy, kind relationships. There are no arrows on the back. Don’t stand on your head. Just folding laundry while laughing.’

Although it is not known when Alison met her current partner, Trespasses actor Tom Cullen, the pair share two children together aged four and two.

In her post, Alison explains how ‘bullies past and present are trying to come out of their caves’ these days, and she’s no longer going to stay silent – ​​having children has changed her too much.

‘Laying down keeps me awake at night, every parent knows that anything that disturbs your precious sleep is not worth it. It felt like a test from the universe. How to be kind yet stand up for yourself? Bullies think good people are weak, but do we? “Especially if the good person is someone who can write songs,” he added.

A few days later, Alison posted another photo of herself with short, wavy hair, explaining that she initially wanted to share this photo, but was worried about how it would be received.

‘I balked at the thought of posting a photo that might be labeled as angry in the same week as calling out a former bully. the fear of being labeled a vengeful, scorned woman who had cut her hair and therefore had to hate all men really kicked in,’ she said.

‘I laughed as I dug these ridiculous words out of my subconscious. But I think this story is worth showing, because it’s the crazy stories that emerge when we want to be brave that can derail us if we let them remain dark, lurking, and terrifying in the shadows of our heads.’

Alison also emphasized in the video following her initial post that during her relationship with the ‘bully’ she was not a ‘sheep’, but rose to the occasion in the face of an ‘aggressive’ relationship that ultimately weakened her.

‘I did fight in that situation. I don’t just lie down,” he explained, adding that he was “arguing with someone who moves through the world with that energy and I don’t.”

Reflecting on it, Alison says this style of communication is ‘a tactic that bullies use’ – namely ‘calling you names and hitting you with one nasty thing after the next, which goes beyond acceptable interpersonal behaviour’.

When this happened, Alison said she felt ‘defeated, disappointed, lethargic and sad’.

‘It’s easy to lose yourself and slip into apathy and walk away from your agency and hand over the keys to the kingdom. You’re just tired,’ he explained. ‘That’s how they get what they want.’

It was Jane Goodall’s documentary that lit a fire in Alison’s belly and inspired her to speak out.

‘I want to see the world and say what I see, and not be afraid of the consequences,’ he said.

Alison’s original post was liked by Lily Allen, who she also supported on social media, replying with seven fire emojis on Lily’s post promoting West End Girl.

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